Today I’m feeling disenfranchised. I’ve been trying on and off for several years to start a supper club; or brunch or afternoon tea, etc. But everyone is just so darn busy. It seems like even a couple hours once a month is an unattainable commitment. People just have so many things going on all the time (and when I say people I mean my family also unless we’re intentional about it.)
I can’t help but wonder what the consequences are gonna be in a generation or two, when our kids lack the ability to form long term relationships, or just continue to feel like busy is necessary for a half healthy life. Where did rest, spontenaity, and random creative fun with friends go? I don’t have a solution, and I love extra curricular activities so I’m not trying to criticize anything specific, just musing.
For my part, I try to be very intentional about not scheduling too many activities. But I can see how things can easily get out of hand. With four kids, if I put them in just two activities a week that ends up being 8 sessions of something. At the moment, only my oldest two find value in outside the house non-school activities. Also for the moment they each only get one activity, but that isn’t set in stone, and may increase as they get older.
That said, I really do want to be intentional about allowing time for boredom, and creative activities. Time for spontaneous playdates, and days spent just for nothing at all. Finding the balance is hard. Friendship in adulthood is hard. Managing expectations is hard. I want to let my kids be kids for as long as possible. But for now, I guess I’m going to keep trying to make and maintain new and old friendships, even when it’s difficult.
Today I’m going to do the dishes, and one load of laundry. I’m going to sweep the living areas, and do a five minute tidy. These are things in getting to make into a daily habit. Maybe then I can find more time to do other projects once these daily things aren’t so difficult.
